Dear Septic Tank Workers,
It was such a pleasure walking by you this morning as you all pointed and laughed. And if you were curious, I did hear you call me "a fat bitch" even though my iPod was in full force. I'm not mad at the fat comment or the laughing and pointing, but the bitch comment made me mad. If I was such a bitch then I would have released the leash of my 60 pound boxer with the command "sic balls". Who would be laughing then?
Just to let you all know, the three of you are homely looking. Seriously, I would have to be severely drunk to remotely find you attractive. And forget about putting your P in my V (which is sad since I'm pretty easy). I have no doubt that you three are tipping the scales at 300 pounds with those beer guts of yours. And you call ME fat. HA! I don't look like I will give birth at the flick of a wrist. It took all my strength to pull in my bitchyness and not point and laugh at you three!
I'll give you a plus for having a job, but the reality is you shovel shit for a living! Your company is now high ranking on my shit list (how appropriate) and you will not have to worry about me calling on your services. Instead of bringing me down, I've decided that I'm going to use this to fight that much harder. One day I will turn your heads and you will still be shoveling shit with your homely looking faces.
That is all.